Good Job

Some days are just harder than others. My husband headed out at 5:30 this morning to attend a master’s swim class at the gym. Two minutes later he re-entered the bedroom to notify me that our car had been broken into. Sign o’ the times? Or just some punk kids? Either way, another bill, another tragedy (of sorts) and another headache. So, what did we do? My husband took the second car to the gym, and I got on the phone with the insurance company who said it would be cheaper to pay for it ourselves than go through them. What am I paying insurance for again?? Anyway, it took several hours to get things moderately wrapped up at work and for the tension to sufficiently build before I pulled on my running shoes and headed out the door. By that time it was early afternoon and all I could think of was how much I wanted to get away from the house/office (same location) and step onto trail, or pavement, or even rocky terrain. Anything, really, but be indoors looking at the number of email requests I needed to return, the amount of work that needed to be done and the bills that continue to pile up. Sign o’ the times?

Back to the pavement. I drove quietly down to the fish hatchery, saying my thanks for a running car, sunshine and some time to myself. You know, running is a mental game. Sometimes more mental than physical – maybe that’s the norm instead of the exception, but it’s hard to overcome. Though my heart was saying, “Just get there and run, Leah,” my mind was whispering, “Are you sure about this? There are so many things you should be doing. It’s getting warm. You know you don’t like to run in the heat.” And on…and on…and on. I could have quit right there and just headed back to work. The mind is a powerful weapon. But, I didn’t.

I stepped out of my car, strapped on my water belt, set my Nike+ Sportband and headed out. Immediately my lungs grumbled at me. They seemed to be saying, “Grrr…Leah…grrr…wheeze…not sure you can do this….” I ignored them, took some deep breaths and plodded on. I was feeling pretty good about my pace, around a 9mm, but then it happened. Some guuuy just had to pass me in what appeared to be an easy lope, hardly even breathing (I swear!) and just kept on going. Oh, how defeating it can feel to be passed as if you’re standing still. I decided to stare at the ground instead of at the back of Mister-Easy-Runner-Dude and told myself to not look at him. “You are out here for yourself. Not for him. Not for anyone else.” I had planned on doing 4 miles, but ended up doing 5.24. Let’s just round up to five and a quarter, shall we? Around mile four my stomach flipped, so I walked a minute, grabbed some Jelly Belly Sport Beans, swallowed a few gulps of Heed, and finished up the run. The final quarter mile was an 8.47mm pace. My overall pace was 9.17. Though I didn’t feel 100% on the run, I’m glad I went. Sometimes, the toughest days are the ones you want to crawl into bed. But I swear to this: I always feel better after I exercise. Even when it’s not the best run, it’s still something. It’s an easy way to pat oneself on the back and say, “Good job.”